Moms Who Get High
When my son was born, it was through an incision in my abdomen. I was medicated with morphine and several other drugs, and I don’t remember much of his birth. Three days later, I was given codeine and other medications to take at home and sent swiftly on my way. I felt uncertain about taking painkillers while breastfeeding, even though the doctors said it was okay. I used them for a couple days, but they made me feel so loopy that it was hard for me to remember if I’d fed the baby, they reduced my appetite so severely I became malnourished and dehydrated, and they made it difficult for me to connect with my infant son. When I held him, I could barely feel his weight, and I couldn’t tell if I was being gentle enough with him because my sense of touch was altered. So I stopped taking the codeine. After that, the physical pain of recovery from my surgery was more excruciating than I could have ever imagined. When the baby cried, sitting up was agonizing. Lifting him to my breast was literally gut-wrenching.